Sick...

No class update today because I stayed home. :(

Honestly, I probably could have made it work, but I woke up last Sunday all congested and runny nosed and achy. It eventually turned into a barky cough and I'm still kind of dealing with the remnants. I missed work and everything. Luckily, it's not Covid, but I had multiple people tell me to not push it. I haven't exercised at all this week other than walking my steps. Was worried that I might have a coughing fit or something and I didn't want to get my TC sick.

Add bad weather yesterday and the fact that my parents are away so Dom would have had to come with me and I'm not 100% gutted that I'm missing. I still have about a month until the class feis and I keep on trying to tell myself that I was never peaking for this competition, but it's hard.

I think my bigger issues right now is trying to find something to wear. My new dress will most likely not be ready in time so I purchased a new leotard and skirt for the "black out" look. You probably know the one...it has pretty lace sleeves...

IT LOOKS AWFUL. 

Like, I won't sugarcoat, I need to control what I put in my mouth. I am an emotional eater, but ugh...this is not helping my state of mind. Yes, I know that I'm proud of what I'm able to do with this body, but there is no way I'll feel pretty and confident in it so I have to return it. I ordered a couple other dresses that are not as skin tight, but are short sleeved and I'm not sure if that is going to be okay either, but I guess I'll wait to see if they fit first before asking my teachers. Honestly, it's not even the waist that's bothering as much as my chests and shoulders so idk. 

A positive note is that I've been doing a lot of visualization and I feel like it's working? My "third round" for this upcoming feis is Saint Patrick's Day and it's pretty solid. Now that I'm feeling better I'm hoping to drill some things for my hard shoe round specifically.

I'm also giving up take-out for lent so hopefully that will help a bit with my body image as well. Like I know that muscle weighs more than fat, but I got to change something...

Sorry for being kind of gloomy this week,

Kay