After Rock Bottom

Don’t worry, I’m still dancing.

I feel like my last entry was kind of bleak. I won’t say that things are one hundred percent better, I’ll be honest with you and tell you parts of December and even January were still rough, but I’m starting to see and feel results because I knew something had to change. There’s a long way to go, but I feel like I’m more committed to getting to champs than ever before, so that has to be a positive direction.

December: Shortly after I updated last, I ended up going to what was formerly known as the Holly Feis, I can’t remember what they call it now. As per usual, I went alone and even though I know plenty of people once I get there, I felt so lonely and was sitting next to a garbage can. A positive note was getting a 4th in my prizewinner reel in a big competition, but “hates me through association” judge was there so that was all I got. After that I got sick. Add that to my messed up schedule and my stamina was gone. I couldn’t get through a full in ANY dance. I was so upset. Luckily I was able to relax over the break.

January: I’m not sure how it is in your region, but it seems like so many competitions did not happen in January so I only went to one, The Fairfield County Championships. I’m still trying to figure out how to compete in a way that makes me not frantic when I’m on stage, so I tried to not fight for the corner, so I think that caused me to not really make an impression. I ended up with a third in treble jig, but spent a good part of my day sitting on the floor in a hallway alone.

It was around this time that I decided that I’m ready to make some changes to better myself. I love competing, but I need to do what I can to set myself apart. I needed to stop relying on easier steps since I’ve been playing with the hard ones for about a year now. So I began to push myself out of my comfort zone. I spent a whole private lesson fixing and polishing what will be my steps in Treble Jig until after the 2018 oireachtas (first places dependent of course) I also attacked my reel lead that has been giving me issues for months and comitted to my new hornpipe step that I did in competiton for a while but stopped because I would have no stamina by the end. I joined a gym so that I could work on my stamina and what not closer to home. The work paid off because now I have no issues with my hornpipe, but not going to stop there.

The only downside is that someone stepped on my phone at class one night, not realizing it was in my bag and shattered the screen. My husband flipped out and told me I’m not allowed to feis until it’s paid for. My husband could be a whole post himself...but I’m trying to prove to you (and really myself) that I’m on an upswing. And don’t worry, I’m still going to feis, just have to figure that conversation out logistically.

February: It’s only the 8th, but I feel like a lot has already happened. First is that I danced at O’Rourke (It was already paid for before phone-gate) and debuted my new steps with large groups. I got a 3rd in my prizewinner hornpipe and was just out of placing with the rest (even with a minor error in the treble jig step I’ve been doing for a year!) I think the biggest victory in all of this was that I felt very calm and even though I had new steps I didn’t feel nervous or anxious while doing them. I felt that my dancing the last two weeks in class has been very promising as well. I want to continue this!

I did take a chance and ask my TC about moving everything to prizewinner. It’s not even because I want to be out of the grades, but I’m just sick of waiting around and feeling lonely. Last weekend wasn’t so bad because I had friends from other schools, but I still got home extremely late. Ultimately, the conversation went how I expected it to and I’m still split between the two levels but I guess it’s just even more proof that it’s time to buckle down, fix the issues that I have, and hope that the coming months are even better. Here’s a rough overview of what I think I’m going to do:

-Continue the gym 2-3 days a week, but instead of just doing cardio. Do half cardio for stamina and then work with free weights and what not to work on upper body and core. Going to find a list of exercises.

-Back to my calf raise regiment. TC says it’s not an issues in soft shoe anymore so I’ll do 100 a day, 50 in hard shoe, 50 crossed in 5th position.

-Crossing is my biggest shortcoming right now. I think it is something that I need to be mindful of at all times. I know that I need to think about having my inner thighs touch while I’m dancing, but I’m also going to start doing drills and exercises so that I’m constantly in this habit.

I am ready to give the judges no choice but to move me. Hell, maybe I’ll do that typical two years in novice before getting out of prizewinner quickly once they are all in. I mean if I can keep up in champ class doesn’t that mean I’m doing something right?

Okay, Thank for checking in!

Kay