Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Goodbye My Friend

I had a completely different post drafted on here and then I got some really terrible news on Sunday night. I found out my friend Dave passed away. It was a complete shock, I read the facebook post and burst into tears. How could it be true? But it is and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. I thought I had my wits more about me today but then I found a picture for this post and lost it all over again.

You hear or see it all the time; some acquaintance dealing with the death of a friend of a loved one. You say you're sorry, you feel bad, but there is no comparison when it's someone you know, when it's happening to you. People tell him to rest easy, but I hate that expression. I know it's supposed to be a good thing to say, but it just seems lazy and informal to me. I hope that doesn't offend anyone but rest in peace is just better for  me and I even hate that. I can only imagine how his family feels, I feel like someone punched me in the chest and our friendship pretty much diminished once I met my husband.

I could continue to remain sad or even angry at times, but there is so much about Dave that is worth remembering with a smile. So that is what I plan to do now;  To tell you about him and how great he was.

I met Dave in the fall of 2007 when I was a freshman at CCSU. We were in marching band together and I was dating one of his best friends. One night my boyfriend at the time drove me to an apartment off campus, it was Dave's and it was a place that had all my favorite old video games and delicious food that was always deep fried. It seemed so mature that he had an apartment of his own! We spent a lot of time there and Dave was always up to something; making amazing chicken, popcorn from scratch, once he threw muffins at his ceiling and his shower door had a hole in it from a rogue air soft pellet. Eventually one of my friends from home starting dating Dave's other best friend and the five of us became as thick as thieves. We took classes together, hung out at the student center and spent almost all our free time together. We even had a name for our group "East Hampton Boys Meet Torrington Girls complete with the acronym EHBMTG and the rest was history.  We even tried to get Dave his own Torrington girl, but sadly it did not work out.

Dave was great for picking you up and taking you for food or over to his apartment or eventually the one that all three East Hampton Boys shared.  He actually took me and couple other of my friends Christmas shopping when the malls were mobbed and I wouldn't have wanted to drive myself. He quoted Doug and Family Guy all the time ("Mmmm...Piece of Candy!") and played the saxophone better than most people I knew. He once came to my parents house in the summer and broke one of my parents plastic deck chairs by leaning too far back when we had a campfire. The five of us watched cop shows and all three back to the future movies in one sitting. He composed beautiful marches; I got to witness him conduct pieces that bands commissioned from him and he wrote one for each of his friends for Christmas one year. Mine was called "With Beau and Belle" and it was a play on words since I was a viola major at the time. He was great for a laugh, and he gave me a nickname that one of my cousin's still calls me: Kelldonia (after the song Caldonia It's in the video below!)

Sadly relationships ended and once I met my husband the East Hampton Boys Meets Torrington Girls faded into memory. Even still, Dave was still pleasant whenever I saw him. I just think it's so crazy that just a few weeks ago I met Kasey, his girlfriend from back in high school, and we were talking about how we knew him. Life is strange.

I really stink at wrapping things up, but I want everyone out there to know my life was made better by meeting you Dave. I bet you would laughing at me because I've become so obsessed with dance but secretly understanding because you were so passionate about the things that you loved. These next two competitions are for you.

 See you later,

Kay AKA "Kelldonia"

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